Topic: American Carol
I saw this and recommend it!
"A Christmas Carol" is a Charles Dickens story very much liked in America. Scrooge, a rich miser who hates Christmas and berates his nephew and employee for enjoying it, is visited by his partner's ghost who warns him he'll be visited by 3 ghosts, Christmas Past Present and Future. These ghosts show Scrooge that he used to enjoy Christmas, that his nephew and poor employee enjoy it fine without him, and if he stays a miserly git he will die unloved and kids will die who could have been saved. Scrooge awakes in time to celebrate Christmas and become a nice guy.
Rightwingers took that format and told the story of Michael Moore, a whiny liberal who made lying documentaries about America until three Spirits show him why America must kick evil's ass. He wakes up in time to stop a terror attack on Madison Square garden.
What made this movie work was the awful cheap shots and political incorrectness!
MOORE: (In Cuba to praise its healthcare as firing squads execute cripples) Bye everyone, I'm off to America and lousy healthcare!
CUBANS: America! (Swamp moore's boat)
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TERRORLEADER: (watching Minions screw up suicide attack) Jesus!
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TERRORIST: I'm voting for Prop 32! We must have a guest worker program so the Mexicans can come and do the jobs the Taliban won't!
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PARIS HILTON: (presenting liberal film awards) Leni Riesenthal used her massive talent to help Herr Hitler bring his message of Change to German voters. She set the standard for filmmakers to follow.
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MOORES AGENT: Wow did you bathe today?
MOORE: No.
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JFK: Let all nations friendly or hostile know, we shall bear any burden and confront any foe, to preserve liberty!
JFK SPIRIT: you think that meant another 8 UN resolutions?
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MOORE: why do you keep slapping me?
PATTON SPIRIT: it's my trademark
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(PATTON shows Moore that without a war to end slavery he'd be the biggest slaveowner in present-day Alabama)
SLAVE1: massa gon leave now! Errbody wave goodbye to massa!
SLAVE2: Bye massa!
SLAVE3: Bye daddy!
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HITLER, TOJO, MUSSOLINI: (as neville chamberlain shines their boots) Kumbaya, my lord! Kumbaya!
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SECURITY GUARD1: (doing cavity search) Sorry but ever since the Suppository Bomber we cant take chances!
SECURITY GUARD2: you mean the Episcopal Suppository Bomber!
TOURIST: damn those Christians
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WEHRMACHT PLATOON: i dont know but I been told/Jews teeth are made of gold
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MOORE: why are you slapping me! Youre not a spirit!
BILL OREILLY: I know. I just enjoy slapping you.
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REFORMED TERRORISTS: (trying to defuse bomb in toilet stall) I never did this in a bathroom stall before! Just pull it out slowly! Oh! Ooh careful!
MARINE BYSTANDERS: (muttering) Must be sailors.
NAVY BYSTANDERS: (muttering) must be Marines
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MOORE: Gee, spinal cord injury, guess you never saw that coming.
PATTON: yeah that was a rough day
MOORE: so, what do you think of stem cell research now?
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Oh yeah and many suprise cameos by big celebrities
A real hoot!
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.