Re: Frozen Pizza

The phenomena that is frozen pizza is one that may never be fully understood. You stick it in the oven, and cook it for the proper time. Upon removal, the sauce is at a temperature roughly at "molten lava" hot. If you wait around 5-10 minutes it moves from the completely inedible molten lava hot, to the chancy "holy crap this is hot, but if i chew really carefully it might be ok", the stage in which it in fact is never ok. This is the danger zone, that always ends with you completely removing a layer of skin from the roof of your mouth, and burns your taste buds so that you are unable to taste anything else for a week.
The true mystery lies in the stage directly after the maybe its ok stage, in which case...it miraculously goes to unappetizing room temperature. Frozen pizza leaves you with 2 unattractive options, 1. burn the crap out of your mouth. or 2. eat room temperature pizza.



Discuss

<KT|Away> I am the Trump of IC

2 (edited by BiefstukFriet 29-Nov-2012 18:54:47)

Re: Frozen Pizza

Is it because of the content of ice, that melts, turns into water, boils - this is the lava phase - and then evaporates, lowering the temperature?

Je maintiendrai

Re: Frozen Pizza

sounds like your pizza has too much sauce

i tend to burn it, that way I have charred bread with a smear of tomato and cheese, and yes I burn my mouth on that

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: Frozen Pizza

sounds like your oven is possessed.

"I was beginning to think you were afraid to fight."
"I'm just naturally lazy, but I will if I have to."

Retired

Re: Frozen Pizza

stop buying the cheapest once....we have a few here in norway ..that u can eat right out fo the owen...best sellers....GRANDIOSA! fantatic!

Airwing

Re: Frozen Pizza

If it costs more than $2, it isn't a real frozen pizza X(

<KT|Away> I am the Trump of IC

Re: Frozen Pizza

Cook until cheese melts. No longer.

Modestus Experitus

Arby: A very strict mod, reminds me of a fat redneck who drives a truck around all day with a beer in one hand. I hated this guy at the start, however, I played a round in PW with him where he went as an anonymous player. Our fam got smashed up and everyone pretty much left. Arby stayed around and helped out the remaining family. At the end of the round he revealed himself.... My views on him have changed since. Your a good guy.....

Re: Frozen Pizza

> Undeath wrote:

> If it costs more than $2, it isn't a real frozen pizza X(  <


I get what you're saying, but the only thing that costs $2 in california is a cup of coffee

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: Frozen Pizza

Probably we're not taking the proper amount of time to thaw it out.  But what the hell, if you wanted a lot of bother then go buy Boboli and cheese and sauce and peppers and ask your mom to make a pizza for you.

BTW those mini pizza bites that you bake in the toaster oven come out crispy and saucy, and yes I burn my mouth with those too.

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: Frozen Pizza

if we asked candidates "How do you avoid burning your mouth on frozen pizza" during the Big Debate, I think we'd all save a lot of time wondering who to vote against

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: Frozen Pizza

Romney: "What's that?"

Make Eyes Great Again!

The Great Eye is watching you... when there's nothing good on TV...

Re: Frozen Pizza

There is however one thing worse than frozen pizza....the HotPocket

<KT|Away> I am the Trump of IC

13 (edited by The Yell 29-Nov-2012 21:47:18)

Re: Frozen Pizza

what, I like hot pockets, you can nuke them to yumminess

kinda pricey thought


these days I eat a $0.59 bag of Budding lunchmeat.  And free coffee.

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: Frozen Pizza

hey now. whats wrong with hot pockets?

"I was beginning to think you were afraid to fight."
"I'm just naturally lazy, but I will if I have to."

Retired

Re: Frozen Pizza

I know everybody says oven is better... but really it's all about the microwaved pizzarito.  Let me explain:

You buy one of those cheap cheap cheap frozen pizzas, the little personal sized ones, and you throw it in the microwave for 2 or 3 mins.  The crust won't be crunchy, but that's not what you want.  You want that cheap microwaved chewiness, because you're not going to cut this thing up.  Oh no, you're going to grab it at one end and slowly roll it into itself until you get a nice thick burrito-like yet pizza-like snack.  If you do it right not only will you get that gooey cheesy pizza goodness but you'll also get little explosions of the pizza sauce with each bite.

It's the best.

Got a few bucks?  The Imperial Tip Jar is accepting contributions!

Re: Frozen Pizza

im going to walmart now... want some pizza

"I was beginning to think you were afraid to fight."
"I'm just naturally lazy, but I will if I have to."

Retired

Re: Frozen Pizza

I'd settle for a loaf of sourdough bread

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: Frozen Pizza

Um... ill get you some while im out and sell it to you on the market

"I was beginning to think you were afraid to fight."
"I'm just naturally lazy, but I will if I have to."

Retired

Re: Frozen Pizza

Sounds like it's time for a Deci-recipe!

You take two oven pizza's put extra blue cheese on them and heat them up.
You fry some eggs and bacon.

You place one pizza on a plate, put the eggs on it, put the bacon on it, and put the other pizza on top, upside down.

Now eat.

NEE NAW NEE NAW

Primo

20 (edited by The Yell 30-Nov-2012 16:34:09)

Re: Frozen Pizza

um. what the hell do you people call pizza, that you'd add fried eggs and bleu cheese?

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: Frozen Pizza

Primo, I don't think Deci's tastes are as refined as that. I'm sure his pizzas include penis and fecal matter.

Modestus Experitus

Arby: A very strict mod, reminds me of a fat redneck who drives a truck around all day with a beer in one hand. I hated this guy at the start, however, I played a round in PW with him where he went as an anonymous player. Our fam got smashed up and everyone pretty much left. Arby stayed around and helped out the remaining family. At the end of the round he revealed himself.... My views on him have changed since. Your a good guy.....

Re: Frozen Pizza

Make sure you put confetti and candy canes in it as well  big_smile !!

"I was beginning to think you were afraid to fight."
"I'm just naturally lazy, but I will if I have to."

Retired

Re: Frozen Pizza

maybe you have herpes and that's what burning your mouth area

So I told the cop, "No YOU'RE driving under the influence... of being a JERK!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFjjO_lhf9c

Re: Frozen Pizza

1. wtf have you been?
2. did you bring back pizza?

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: Frozen Pizza

i was tossed into the abyss for being evil but i escaped

So I told the cop, "No YOU'RE driving under the influence... of being a JERK!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFjjO_lhf9c