Topic: any rich man here?

the reply to the post is just genius!


This is a real posting from Craig's List and absolutely hilarious

This is real, read the entire thing because the guy's response is priceless.

Please see this posting a girl put on Craig's list:

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 432279810


HERE IS THE RESPONSE:
THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful"
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic "pump and dump."
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.




Alexandra Harris
Morgan Stanley | Consolidated Equities

i love you all!

Re: any rich man here?

oh god that is epic

Not many people know this, but I own the first radio in Springfield. Not much on the air then, just Edison reciting the alphabet over and over. "A" he'd say; then "B." "C" would usually follow...

Re: any rich man here?

I enjoy it every time I read it

Not many people know this, but I own the first radio in Springfield. Not much on the air then, just Edison reciting the alphabet over and over. "A" he'd say; then "B." "C" would usually follow...

4 (edited by Justinian I 20-May-2009 08:40:18)

Re: any rich man here?

That's over two years old. But it's ofc just epic.

It's what inspired me to call women "depreciating assets."

Re: any rich man here?

epic idd

Re: any rich man here?

hahahahahaha classic

[I wish I could obey forum rules]

Re: any rich man here?

"It's what inspired me to call women "depreciating assets.""

Your DNA must cry itself to sleep at night!

God: Behold ye angels, I have created the ass.. Throughout the ages to come men and women shall grab hold of these and shout my name...

Re: any rich man here?

> Wild Flower Soul wrote:
Your DNA must cry itself to sleep at night!>

Oh come now. It's true.

9 (edited by [RPA] Lloyd List 20-May-2009 11:00:21)

Re: any rich man here?

I know I'll probably get a lot of stupid comments, but I have to ask anyway.

What's so epic about this? It's amusing, at best..

I'll never know if it was worth the pain, but I still loved it more than anything in the world - it was my life.

Re: any rich man here?

I'll have to agree with Eltara on this.
It was worth the read, but i doubt i'll be carrying it in my wallet or anything.

NEE NAW NEE NAW

Primo

Re: any rich man here?

Well, it's nothing new either. Beautiful women have been marrying unattractive men who make enough money for ages.

This forum is stupid.

Re: any rich man here?

I'll be your beautiful woman Blondeh.

Get rich first though kthx.

Re: any rich man here?

It's hard to weed out the gold diggers. You can delay suggesting your income range at first, but you cannot conceal style and class. :-/

[I wish I could obey forum rules]

Re: any rich man here?

depends on how beautiful said gold digger is, if she's a bombshell and you're not quite mr. hot then it should not be too hard

average looking gold diggers must be hard to spot

in short: ugly women ftw!

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sdffdgjfhjdfhgjhsfsdfqgsbsthzgflqkcgjhkgfjnbkmzghkmqrghqmskdghqkmsghnvhdf
qmkjghqmksdjqlskhqkmsdhqmskfhjqmskjdfhqkmsdfjhqmskfhjqkmsjdfhqkm
sjfhqkmsjfhqkmsjfhkqmjsfhqksdjmfhqksjfhqskjdfhnbwfjgqreutyhaerithgfqsd
kjnqsdfqsdfqsdfmkjqhgmkjnqsgkjmhzdflmghjsmdlghjsmdkghmqksdjghq

Re: any rich man here?

What? You craaaaazy...

Beautiful women rule.

And you can be stylish and classy without money, BeeGee.

P.S. Arfehhhh, I'm loaded... in the pants yikes

This forum is stupid.

Re: any rich man here?

at the back part, with crap though ....

Re: any rich man here?

there is actually a reply to that, not hard to find bestofcraiglist ftw

<parrot> there is also the odd  possibility that tryme is an idiot
<KT> possibility?
<genesis> tryme is a bit of an idiot
<Torqez> bit?

Re: any rich man here?

> [TI] Mrblonde wrote:

> What? You craaaaazy...

Beautiful women rule.

And you can be stylish and classy without money, BeeGee.

P.S. Arfehhhh, I'm loaded... in the pants yikes <

Spend your load on my face bb.

Re: any rich man here?

I can't tell my story sad it involves a client

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

Re: any rich man here?

*spend*

This forum is stupid.