"Q. Why does Obama Messiah wear his hair so short?
A. So it won

sigh... the reason for the joke is his new relationship with Islamic Radicals... and he gave his first press interview to an Islamic news agency as President.

Obama is a Sikh?

> Dirty Iluvatar wrote:

> hehe

people need to make up jokes about obama

when a republican gets into office, he just acts like a retard and all we have to do is paste the youtube links

And that, without a doubt...is the funniest thing in the whole thread.

The old priest lay dying in the hospital. For years he had faithfully served the people of the nation's capital.

He motioned for his nurse to come near.

"Yes, Father?" said the nurse.

"I would really like to see Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi before I die," whispered the priest.

"I'll see what I can do, Father" replied the nurse. The nurse sent the request to them and waited for a response.

Soon the word arrived. Harry and Nancy would be delighted to visit the priest. As they went to the hospital, Harry commented to Nancy, "I don't know why the old priest wants to see us, but it will certainly help our images." Nancy couldn't help but agree.

When they arrived at the priest's room, the priest took Nancy's hand in his right hand and Harry's hand in his left. There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priest's face. Finally Nancy spoke.

"Father, of all the people you could have chosen, why did you choose us to be with you as you near the end?"

The old priest slowly replied, "I have always tried to pattern my life after our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ."

The old priest continued, "He died between two lying thieves. I would like to do the same."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I recently asked my friend's little girl what she wanted to be when she grew up. She said she wanted to be president some day. Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were president, what would be the first thing you would do?"

She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people."

Her parents beamed.

"Wow...what a worthy goal." I told her, "But you don't have to wait until you're president to do that. You can come over to my house and mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $50 to use toward food and a new house."

She thought that over for a few seconds, then she looked me straight in the eye and asked, "Why doesn't the homeless guy go over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?"

I said, "Welcome to the Republican Party."

Her parents still aren't speaking to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Mr. President:

Here is the perfect plan to solve the nation's job, economic and housing crises all at once.

There are about 40 million people over 50 in the work force

I can't recall the last time I heard somebody say "I disagree with George Bush's policies" period. It's always followed by some declaration of hate against Bush and the people who elect him and/or demand for his imprisonment.

And I don't recall the last time I heard a right-winger say the poor don't deserve health care, only, that everybody else don't deserve to pay for it.

The poor don't deserve health care. They breed like rabbits and are causing civilization's decline toward Idiocracy.

Idiocracy was a great movie.

lol Flint are all your jokes one sided or do you have any jokes about republicans? =p

no more jokes ?

> Einstein wrote:
I recently asked my friend's little girl what she wanted to be when she grew up. She said she wanted to be president some day. Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were president, what would be the first thing you would do?"

She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people."

Her parents beamed.

"Wow...what a worthy goal." I told her, "But you don't have to wait until you're president to do that. You can come over to my house and mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $50 to use toward food and a new house."

She thought that over for a few seconds, then she looked me straight in the eye and asked, "Why doesn't the homeless guy go over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?"

I said, "Welcome to the Republican Party."

Her parents still aren't speaking to me.

Besides the fact that this isn't funny but meant to be a statement, why did you not offer $50 to the homeless guys at the grocery store? You are looking at it from the wrong perspective.