• Posts: 3,373

Topic: Need help - Job

How do you get a job?

I have no clue. I never had one before, but I need a part time one to make up for lost income thanks to the economy.

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 5,595
  • Tag points: 241

Re: Need help - Job

Lost income when you didn't have a job in the first place?

Make Eyes Great Again!

The Great Eye is watching you... when there's nothing good on TV...

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 3,373

Re: Need help - Job

> Zarf BeebleBrix wrote:

> Lost income when you didn't have a job in the first place?>

Correct

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Rin
  • Rin
  • Player
  • Offline
  • Posts: 7,907
  • Tag points: 21

Re: Need help - Job

posting less on the political forum might help.

<parrot> there is also the odd  possibility that tryme is an idiot
<KT> possibility?
<genesis> tryme is a bit of an idiot
<Torqez> bit?

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 3,639
  • Tag points: 345

Re: Need help - Job

lol

Sex without the e is still SX!

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Skoe
  • Skoe
  • Player
  • Offline
  • Posts: 15

Re: Need help - Job

> lies, you can put that on your resume

Pfft, dont hand in a resume. Just hand in the politics forum URL on a piece of paper. They'll know.

Morbo: Morbo can't understand his teleprompter. He forgot how you say that letter that looks like a man with a hat.
Linda: It's a 't'. It goes "tuh".
Morbo: Hello, little man. I will destroy you!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpP7b2lUxVE

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Ps
  • Player
  • Offline
  • Posts: 3,725
  • Tag points: 10

Re: Need help - Job

sell everything you own and collect the big welfare check you're going to be receiving from obama

Rehabilitated IC developer

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 14,366
  • Tag points: 68

Re: Need help - Job

Go to the library and read "What Color Is Your Parachute" and follow that

Or

Figure out off the top of your head what you want to do, find that category in the phone book, and call each listed company and ask if they're hiring

Or

Go to the campus job center and take whatever

Or

Craigslist


Do a resume which for you is just your name and addy phone number and high school andcurrent school

When you are offered an interview go to it. Dress nice and conservative. STFU about whores.

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 2,453
  • Tag points: 4142

Re: Need help - Job

walk into a store, shop, officebuilding, whatever

ask for the manager

ask for a job

mission accomplished

<@Nolio> Ilu was the man back in the day,he even made monkeywrench and arganon look good for half a round =p
<@iluvatar> it is my grandest achievement
<@Nolio> *half a round  =p
<@iluvatar> still
* Final_Doom is now known as Thanks_Iluvatar

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 3,454

Re: Need help - Job

get a haircut, shave if you're man enough to need to shave, take a shower so you dont stink quite so much. where clean, business casual clothing, and get an interview. act friendly and courteous while also acting like you'll be able to handle anything they throw at you. and because we all know you're a man whore, you mind as well offer some to the employer if she's a woman....

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 798
  • Tag points: 60

Re: Need help - Job

Write your resume on a big sandwich board and wear it while walking down the business district.

&#9745;&#65279; Saddam Hussein &#9745; Osama Bin Laden &#9744; Justin Bieber

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 5,595
  • Tag points: 241

Re: Need help - Job

A sweet catch phrase businesses look for:

"Will work for food"

Make Eyes Great Again!

The Great Eye is watching you... when there's nothing good on TV...

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 4,743
  • Tag points: 85

Re: Need help - Job

ZoZ, that is a grand idea

<KT|Away> I am the Trump of IC

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 3,304
  • Tag points: 25

Re: Need help - Job

Protip: Don't ask for advice from an on-line board

Not many people know this, but I own the first radio in Springfield. Not much on the air then, just Edison reciting the alphabet over and over. "A" he'd say; then "B." "C" would usually follow...

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 3,611
  • Tag points: 19

Re: Need help - Job

Acquire a skill and market yourself ...

~ Cloud

"I Cannot Awake From This Nightmare As Long As You Exist..."

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 3,304
  • Tag points: 25

Re: Need help - Job

Suck his rooster

Not many people know this, but I own the first radio in Springfield. Not much on the air then, just Edison reciting the alphabet over and over. "A" he'd say; then "B." "C" would usually follow...

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 602

Re: Need help - Job

1, Dress smart....but casual (don't turn up in a tux)
2, Shake hand firmly (but don't try to break anything and if they grip hard as well concede....this is not wrestling....no suplexes)
3, Never break eye-contact (this can be construed by employer as dishonesty/boredom)....but don't stare like a serial killer
4, If offered a seat wait until they sit first, then take a sit and sit up straight (no slouching!)
5, Remember your manners and etiquette
6, Don't act like you are desperate for a job....if they offer you a position say "may i get back to you once i have considered all the offers that i have....will a couple of hours be okay?" and go for a coffee....this will help you with nerves and also make them think you are in demand and they will feel "happier" on your hiring
7, Try to learn about the prospective business before you join, learn how the company started and try to use some of this information during conversations....such as "oh really? i was always under the impression that....."
8, Do not panic/worry....this is just an agreed "private transaction"....your time/services for their money

....hope this helps

....Marijuana: proud sponsors of the snack food industry since it began

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 3,611
  • Tag points: 19

Re: Need help - Job

Canna that's good tips on how to get a good job, but seeing as he obviously has no skills that would put him "in demand" i doubt he'd have to do #7 ... instead just sort of go along and say i'd be than happy to work for you or something to that effect.

~ Cloud

"I Cannot Awake From This Nightmare As Long As You Exist..."

0 Dislike 0 Post Points

  • Posts: 602

Re: Need help - Job

....or there is the whole "on your knees begging for a chance" thing....followed by the "general brown-nosing and grovelling" approach too....or just pull a gun on him/her (only good for REALLY short term prospects not long term career move....unless sewing up mailbags is your thing!) and say plllleeeeaaaasssseeee!

....Marijuana: proud sponsors of the snack food industry since it began

0 Dislike 0 Post Points