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Topic: Parable of the Cows

DEMOCRAT

You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
You push for higher taxes so the government can provide cows for everyone.

REPUBLICAN

You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So? Go get a job so you can buy one if you want one.

SOCIALIST

You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

CAPITALISM: AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY: AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.
Under the new farm program, the government pays you to shoot one and milk the other.
Then they pour the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when one cow drops dead.
You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.

POLISH CORPORATION

You have two bulls.
Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.

ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You don

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

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Re: Parable of the Cows

in bosnia they'd send the cows through a minefield

.... eh too old...

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Re: Parable of the Cows

mmm mined cow...

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

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Re: Parable of the Cows

ahh good shit tongue

Friend is a four letter word.

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Re: Parable of the Cows

BELGIUM:

You have two cows.
You can only milk one.
You try to milk the second one. The government collapses.

☑ Saddam Hussein ☑ Osama Bin Laden ☐ Justin Bieber

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Re: Parable of the Cows

true story..

*Eltara's and Steve Irwins fanclub*
*Lemming of Velcro & Fluo Pencils*

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Re: Parable of the Cows

lol @ zoz
couldn't be more real

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Re: Parable of the Cows

AUSTRALIA

You have two cows
You eat one, and sell the other to China
Your leader looks like Mrs. Ronald McDonald.

I am sKoE
Do you know what the chain of command is here? It's the chain I go get and beat you with to show you who's in command.

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Re: Parable of the Cows

PVV:

You have two cows.
One of them is a Scottish Highlander.
You expel the cow out of the country.

Maar doodslaan deed hij niet, want tussen droom en daad,
Staan wetten in de weg en praktische bezwaren,
En ook weemoedigheid, die niemand kan verklaren,
En die des avonds komt, wanneer men slapen gaat.

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Re: Parable of the Cows

Dalisim:

You have two cows.
They are made of clocks and melting.

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Re: Parable of the Cows

Conservative:

You have two cows. They are taught from birth to fend for themselves and to show up on time for their daily milking. They get good rates for their milk which is made into better property for them.


Liberal
You have two cows, they bicker all day that their food allowance is to low and that they do not get enough health care. They refuse to give milk until their demands are met.



Libertarian
You have two cows, but no one has seen them in years. You get odd phone calls from them asking for bail money time to time. Usually over drug or gun charges.



Environmentalist
You were told you had two cows, but how can anyone own anything of nature? Instead your cows were set free immediately by you/ You watched as the circle of life resulted in a pack of wolves eating the cows, just before the wolves went to feast on you.


PETA
You were given two abandoned cows. They cost to much to continue caring for, so you had them put down 'humanely'.



Will Smith
Will Smith had two cows, then the robots came and got one... Later when the plague claimed almost all of humanity you saw the other one get eaten by the ghouls because it would not walk into the light.



Obama
Obama has two cows. They are political dead weights so he has hid them where his school records are. Good luck finding them!

Everything bad in the economy is now Obama's fault. Every job lost, all the debt, all the lost retirement funds. All Obama. Are you happy now? We all get to blame Obama!
Kemp currently not being responded to until he makes CONCISE posts.
Avogardo and Noir ignored by me for life so people know why I do not respond to them. (Informational)

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Re: Parable of the Cows

Soviet Russia:
Two cows have you.

Make Eyes Great Again!

The Great Eye is watching you... when there's nothing good on TV...

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13 Reply by Little Paul (edited by Little Paul 30-Aug-2011 12:54:45)

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Re: Parable of the Cows

Cuba:
you have 2 cows
One does eye surgery on the other while smoking cigars. That blind cow is released to the US disguised as a criminal.

IC:
you have 2 cows
both are multies in the same 2 rivaling fams.

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Re: Parable of the Cows

Political Board:
you have two cows that indirrectly refence themselves in posts to feel less guilty about thier weight. just wait, they will be back

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Re: Parable of the Cows

Nigeria:
You have 0 cows.  You send emails to thousands of Americans claiming that a Nigerian prince has died and left them with 3,000 cows, but they need to give you the keys to their farm so you can put all the cows in their farm.  You steal all the cows and become a Nigerian prince.

Make Eyes Great Again!

The Great Eye is watching you... when there's nothing good on TV...

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Re: Parable of the Cows

Texas Miracle: 2 cows were here and 14 other cows joined them! Vote for Perry and get the same herd nationally!

Obama Rebuttal:  Those cows were Obama's and there were 400 cows but 398 died under Perry since 2007

Ron Paul : USA out of ranching

The core joke of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is that of course no civilization would develop personal computers with instant remote database recovery, and then waste this technology to find good drinks.
Steve Jobs has ruined this joke.

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