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Imperial Forum → General → How do normal people deal with this?
After two years of denial, I have finally accepted that the only good thing that has ever happened to me (6 years despite her family and "friends" interference) is over.
I have lost my only friend.
How do normal people deal with this?
How do I do this without drugs?
How do I do this alone?
[Not helpful]?
Normal people don't deal with this alone. You need to find someone to talk to about it, someone to bounce your ideas off of. Self harm is not the answer, drugs only mask the problem as does alcohol. Do you have a doctor that you could talk to about it? Sometimes your GP can be a great person to talk to about these things, being all bound by doctor patient confidentiality and all that. Without knowing more about your situation I probably can't give any further advice then that.
I would offer you my advice but I'm probably not a normal person 
Talk to someone real, i.e. not goofs on the internet. I'm sure there are other people who care about you who can help you out. Other friends (I'm sure you do have some, and you will find out who they are now!), siblings? Parents? Other family members? You are not the first person to go through this, other people will understand and they will help.
I'm not normal, but it helps to blame her for a while
It's the "without drugs" bit that scares me... but I already know what will happen to me if I go down that route, and that scares me even more.
[edit]
"real" friends? 
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then dont, its only a woman
there's others who'd enjoy your company if you circulate
Come drinking with me! Fairly sure you're only just down the road from me.
Oddly enough I don't drink... me+beer=convos with ralph & huey
(^_^)_v-~
i guess keep your mind busy, do jobs around the house or take a trip away to clear your head. just need to move on.
Talk to you ic fam leader. He or she is there to help.
If I were to give you some normal sounding advice it would be something like this. Your ultimate rehabilitation is to find someone else to care about. It's been over for 2 years, well it's time to get over it! But don't just go for a quick rebound because you're probably in a bad emotional state and potential mates (oooh I'm almost straying into abnormal advice ) will notice this, and when the quick fix girls reject you you'll be even worse off emotionally. So you need to do some serious soul searching, think about something(s) you've always wanted to do or things you've wanted to improve about yourself and then just do it. Love sickness is really just a chemical reaction in the brain. There is no such thing as a love for life you're destined to be with (okay getting dangerously close to abnormal advice again). There's simply potential mates some great some not so great that you will meet throughout your life. I hope that you will pick yourself up and find a new great mate that sticks with you for the rest of your life this time, I really do.
Fokker i seriously don't know how to offer assistance when i am having a rough patch i tend to have a great group of friends that can talk to. Maybe you're parents? Or you someother people close to you.. Siblings? Friends are the best but u keep saying you have none
Use a church as a place to find new friends. I'm pretty sure that's what they're meant for. It's like a free dating service.
> ☭ Fokker wrote:
> Oddly enough I don't drink... me+beer=convos with ralph & huey
(^_^)_v-~
welp, my advice is out the door
i have a family go poster on my wall which reads "let's drink til we can't feel feelings anymore!"
Go out drinking with some good friends 
But if u dont drink ur in trouble 
Drinking is sure to make everything 100x worse.
Nahh i dont mean drinking alone 
I mean drinking with a few good mates hit the town meet some females
yah that is the truth about Love, you could put up with a number of people if you trained yourself, nobody is THE ONE
I should know, based on my years avoiding it
> ☭ Fokker wrote:
> After two years of denial, I have finally accepted that the only good thing that has ever happened to me (6 years despite her family and "friends" interference) is over.
Your relationship is not the only good thing that has ever happened to you. Good things happen to people every day. You are not your relationship to a girl, you can be a complete person without it. How do you deal with realizing it is truly over? Live your life. Do things you like doing. Talk to people about it. Take up a new hobby. Exercise more. These are all good things in how to come to terms with what happened. Telling yourself that she was the only good thing to ever happen to you only sets yourself up for never moving on.
In accepting that it is over you moved one more step down that path. I think after 2 years of denial, maybe you were finally ready to accept it. You denied it before because you weren't ready, maybe? Now you are ready, and you don't need drugs or alcohol.
Instead of trying to 'fill the void' of a relationship - just live your life, have fun, be confident. Eventually you will come across another girl whom delights your fancy. If you go in a desperate search for fulfillment through a relationship - all you will be doing is torturing yourself.
In the mean time - get out and go do something you enjoy, reconnect with friends, and have some fun.
drugs? well ya don't start shooting up needles. Go smoke a joint though, seriously man you'll feel better. Drink some wine first.
Tia has good points, look for things you enjoy doing and do them. Do things you use to enjoy that you haven't done in a long time, play an old video game, take a hike to a spot you use to go when you were younger. Get a pet.
Go be social, if you have friends go out with them on the weekend, ya you might not want to talk to girls right away but maybe a nice girl will come up to you.
> I think after 2 years of denial, maybe you were finally ready to accept it. You denied it before because you weren't ready, maybe? Now you are ready, and you don't need drugs or alcohol. <
Quoted for truth...
> ya you might not want to talk to girls right away but maybe a nice girl will come up to you. <
Or she'll go mentally hormonal and raep me
_________
I need to eat, man... o|-<
Some really good points above but am sure 99% of us on here couldnt be classed as normal but then again define normal? I
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